So You Love To Shop(part two-The Main Event-)

Okay guys, the other day I told you about my shopping experience with my girlfriends, well the Main event came after that, the main event came about 4 months after that, I had been trying to shed some weight and I felt lighter, so when my significant other (yes my partner) proposed a shopping spree, I said yes without a thought, the thought I should have been thinking was: "I HAVE NOT LOST ANY WEIGHT!". But alas, I wasn't thinking.
    It was a Saturday morning, the previous night we went out for drinks, we had catfish pepper soup, and it was really good too, when we got home, we had wine, so on that Saturday morning, I was a little bit bloated but I wasn't going to turn down shopping because I felt sick. Off we went to this little boutique in town, it was new and the owner, Miss Mabel, swore that she had stuff that would be my perfect size, p.s they always do, I made it a point to ask, not because of what happened four months ago (I had all but forgotten about that episode, if only I had remembered, It would have sent an alarm), but because it had become an unconscious habit. We followed her into the clothing sections, my partner holding my hands with such tenderness and love, it was obvious I was loved, this made me wary of embarrassing us. We got to the denim section, I tried on the first one, it got stuck at my thighs, I tried on another one, the same, so Miss Mabel, eerily helpful, suggested we try another part where she keeps big jeans sizes, at this point I was already getting uncomfortable, and Mr Man was not getting it, he was still following the lady around, we got to the part she suggested and out of the numerous jeans I tried on, only one fit comfortably, and I tried a lot because Mr Man kept prodding me to and I didn't want to seem ungrateful.
    As soon as that particular jeans passed through my hips(the others couldn't because my thighs were just too big, hips to wide, waist too wide), Miss Mabel, who had already started being exasperated, let out a shriek that shocked me, "I said it, ahn ahn, why won't I have your size, when yesterday a lady even bigger than you bought about 6 jeans from me, and designers too", I had a feeling that it was a lie and just a way to give me a little bit of hope, but Mr Man believed her, he said, "leave her o, I keep telling her, your body is perfect, you haven't seen fat girls", I just kept silent, not wanting to say anything to encourage the discussion. We moved to other items, from shirts, gowns, pants, tops to jackets and the story was the same-too tight, bust too big, tight at the arms- I was so humiliated, still I said not a word, so we paid for the lone jean trouser and as I walked out towards the parked car, the sun blazing hot on my skin, I vaguely heard him explain to the lady that we would try another boutique and that if she didn't have plus size stuff why did she say she did, I heard her reply clearly, "oga, no vex, it is not my fault", the unspoken part, I figured, was "...that your girlfriend is that fat", with that in my head, I flipped, I was so angry, I was embarrassed and felt like crying, I was already fuming when he came around the car, got into the driver's seat and was talking about the weather, the weather! As if my life hadn't just ended in there, that's when I started to rant, I told him how it was all his fault, him indulging my sweet tooth, him taking me there, him loving me, him being alive, him being created, I said so many things that I do not remember, and calmly with his annoying reasonable voice as if talking to a stupid child he said there was no need to be angry that there are many stores around and there was a plus size women store in the big mall in the middle of town, I just stared at him, no words could express my hate for him at that point, so I just said take me home.
We drove in silence, and I all but ran from the car when he arrived at my house, I didn't want to see the hurt in his face and feel the need to apologize.
    That said ladies, never go shopping with the bae if you already feel insecure about your body because they don't understand, just kidding, the point is to feel more secure and love yourself.
    There's nothing as beautiful as being comfortable in your own skin and better still having people who love who you are, I am not unrealistic to the plight of the fat woman, and there is also nothing wrong with wanting to be slimmer or more fit, I am on that journey too, but even with all the funny and hurtful episodes, our confidence should never be damped, with fat shaming(I will talk about that in another post) being the order of the day, we should not lose sight of who we really are because we are the only ones who truly know who we are, is that understandable?. Let's say I love myself and honour my body and yes it is difficult but whatever body type( next post) or body size we have, we are Beyoutiful!
   

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